“Needing to be right is a sign of insecurity.”

I bumped into a friend this morning that I hadn’t seen for a while, and in conversation, realized that I was explaining certain aspects of my life to him.

Then later in the morning, in an email, I realized that I was justifying myself to someone when they misread what I meant in a previous email.

What both of these experiences had in common, is that somewhere within me there was a voice that insisted that I made sure people understand that I was in the right – and others in the wrong.

This justification is a sign of insecurity.  Since had I been secure in myself, there would be no need for justification at all!  I would have just smiled and waved, no really caring what the others thought.

Of course, some of you will argue, but if you don’t stand up for yourself, those people will think their assumptions are correct about you, even if they are not.  Don’t you need to set the record straight?

Perhaps.  But probably not all the time.

From a self building perspective, it is probably more important that we allow people to remain with their mistaken beliefs from time to time, in order that we can be more secure in our place in the world, and further realize that what others think about us really doesn’t matter  (as long as we are respectful to everyone).

One other take away, is that if you feel a need to set the record straight, or be right, you have some unfinished business with personal security that you might want to look into.

I know I do, so for the next week, I think I will refrain from correcting people.

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