The other day, I wrote that “it is one of my foundational beliefs that much of that we search for outside of ourselves is due to the fact that we know from subtle internal queues that there are certainly internal truths. Due to the fog of our mind, we can’t quite reach these truths, but we know intuitively that they are true, and since we can’t finding them within, we search outside of ourselves. One of these internal truths is that we exist. We look outside for self validation that we exist, until we can find that truth for ourselves on the inside. The other three that come to mind are wholeness, love, and oneness.”
I wanted to reflect on this idea a little more because I think that ultimately, this is an evasive truth.
I yearn for different things in my emotional life. Love, happiness, purpose, come to immediate mind. I think most people share these yearnings, and chase after them as well. Let’s take a moment and ask why.
In the past, I would have assumed that these were things that we either came to desire due to nature or nurture. For example, we want love since we have evolved (nature) to have someone who looks out for us, as a means of protection. Or perhaps because we had love growing up and it felt good (nurture).
While both of these may be true, it doesn’t really explain why love (and other things I seem to chase) are so very embedded. After all, I have evolved to desire food, and perhaps even told to eat healthy, but I don’t really chase food per se at the core of my existance. I mean, I do, but I don’t, really. Food doesn’t move me to manipulate life to get it.
Perhaps the reason that these yearnings are so deep is in fact because we know them to be true, in our inner essence but there is a dissonance between what we know to be true, and what we find in life. Of course, this is due to the fact that we are somehow cut off from our inner feeling of love (and happiness, and purpose).
It also explains why these are like buckets that can never be filled. As soon as they are filled we want more, more, more. Because we know that certain things are infinite, in the core of our being, so we are trying to find that infinite source outside ourselves, which never works.
And it is only by looking within and finding and connecting with the source of all love (etc), that we can fill this void truly. So think about those things that are insufficient in your life, that you chase after, and see if you can find them in abundance within. Perhaps that really is the answer.